Friday, March 23, 2012

Feels Like I've Been Here Forever........

Seth and Timmy. Seth is my two year old brother, he'll be three soon. Everyday he does something completely cute and silly that makes me think  one day he'll be all grown up, we'll all be. One day I won't be Seth's babysitter, tummy-tickler, kiss-stealer, the one who sticks my tongue out at him. So many things I won't be anymore. No more silly voices. No more afternoons watching silly movies with him.
This new year, or old maybe, God's been giving me so many special moments with my family. Moments where it's like time freezes and it's like God's saying "don't forget to cherish life". Then fear will creep up behind me. Fears like- "maybe God's giving me these moments because I may not have many left. Or something horrible is going to happen to someone."
It seems lately I've been having a lot of fears. Fear of death (which is stupid 'cause I'm a Christian and going to Heaven), fear of life, fear of pain, fear of love. I guess one good thing that came out of this trial is that I've written songs about my fears and God' work in my life, which is good.
It's just that it feels like I've been here forever. But I know that this is going to make me stronger, braver, happier, more free.
Today I was doing some yard work, all dusty and hot (the temperature kind), when I saw two deer run across my neighbor's lawn. And the first thing I thought is how much I wanted to run like they did. Be carefree and have no chains on me. Then I saw birds flying high and beautifully. And I wished I could fly. Wish I could touch the blue, so blue sky and have the wind under me.
But I'm stuck down here for now. And I'm okay. Life's tough, but what would I be without a little trouble or without God's grace. And the answer is NOTHING.
Timmy, goof-ball

Timmy again

Timmy eyes

Sethie

Oh my gosh, my favorite one of the day....

Sethie's blond hair
   

5 comments:

  1. Such a good post Vicky! :) I will be praying for you. <3
    Just remember,that with Jesus we are free like those birds! We are free from sin, hell, and death!- We're not chained down anymore! I love you!!! - oh, and great pics!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Leah. I miss you. :)

      Delete
  2. This is SOOO cute! will be praying for you more too! Seth and Tim are so cute.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for leaving a comment! :)